Evolved

So I have evolved
Into something that I never thought was possible

Who I was and where I was a year ago is total night and day

If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be living in Sacramento,
not going to church,
have a tattoo,
get divorced again,
chop off all my hair,
be drinking coffee,
be drinking alcohol,
swearing up a storm,
and loving life,
I would have judged myself so harshly.
I probably would have spanked my own bottom,
and would have never given myself the room to
grow into a complete person.

Now, I am not saying that the above mentioned create happiness.
In fact, most of the above mentioned has complicated my life to an extent.

What has made me happy, is the opportunity I have given myself
to grow into something that I never thought I would allow myself to be.
The above mentioned have opened up my eyes to see a world different
then the one that I had strictly polluted my world with.

I've learned that I create my own happiness no matter the circumstance
that I either place myself in,
or am placed in.

So...
It's Friday.
I worked my ass off this week.
With my weekend plans ending in an epic cancellation,
I am now free to do whatever the hell I want.
So tonight, I bought fresh paint, paint brushes galore,
and canvases to work with.

I think I'll take a hike this weekend,
place some ear buds in my awkward ears,
bump my tunes,
and paint my worries out.

Then of course have a personal dance party on my way home