It was semi expected
and for the most part painless
It was weird
I said goodbye to her earthly body months ago
and hope to one day get to know her outside of
"Well, when you were a baby you never wanted to spend time with me.
Your mom was sick and you only wanted her." story.
The only thing I imagined yesterday was
Mom hugging her mom,
then me gripping my mom.
in white.
Like a celestial room,
with double mirrors,
and fresh flowers,
and old ladies everywhere
I don't know what happens after life,
but I do know that I believe in it
As a child when I would kneel
by my bedside and roll back and forth
from side to side so as not to push carpet lines
into my tender knees
I would ask God to give
Mom,
Grandpa,
Kelli,
and
Luke
kisses.
I would blow them each out individually.
One, two, three, and four.
I think I'll add another two this evening
for my two grandmas that I have lost
in the past year.
Let's see if I even pray.
Until then.
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