Photo of the Day

Here are some photos of the day from Yen Magazine. Enjoy their beauty.

and then I realized....

The past few months have been so interesting. 

For the longest time I felt like I couldn't breath,

like I was going to drown in my challenges and heartache,

today I don't feel that way. 

When I realized that bruises on your knees are called strawberries

and that being happy is a choice

and that sometimes love is all that matters

and that the truth is hard to hear

and that junk food is delicious

and that muscle and courage take time to build

and that coffee shops don't solve all problems, 

I realized that I love a boy

with all my heart, 

and right now, he is what matters. 

I Do

Today I needed a little Andrea Gibson.
My friend Michelle showed me this poem, and it has inspired me for over a year now.
Although I still don't know exactly how I feel about gay marriage,
I do know that love it true.
I hope you enjoy Andrea's words.

Home

Recently I have been reminded of home. Now usually I consider myself sort of homeless. I claim Seattle as my home base, but honestly, I have rarely returned since my departure in 2004, and my connections in the area are limited. Late 2005 I moved to Elk Grove, CA. I was not excited about the move as I had spent the year previous trying to make friends and connections in Stockton CA. None the less, I moved and started my sophomore year of high school. Elk Grove was a nice community and I remember feeling safe and welcome there. Although many people were kind to me upon my arrival, nothing was more exciting and kind than when I was invited to ride in the Muncy astro van from seminary to school. Stephanie Muncy's astro van holds countless memories of talks, last minute homework assignments, and laughs shared between the few girls that rode in it every day. I made some of my best friends in that van.
Elk Grove quickly turned into my home as my doors started opening up to the wonderful youth in the community. Chelsea Tall and I drank bookoos and snuck into a hotel swimming pool. Muncy, Dubray, Corndog, and countless others danced all over town with me on the hilarious humps and indulations spread out through town. Jordan Tall talked to me on my sidewalk till four in the morning almost every night one summer, and Mehul ditched school dances with me to sit at Starbucks and talk. My 3 years in Elk Grove  were full of countless TP runs, late night hangouts, breakfasts, kisses, and memories exchanged between the numerous people that opened their arms and hearts to me.
Today, my desire to return to CA to visit or even live there is extremely small. Elk Grove has become a thing of the past for me. Most of the people I was closest to have left and rarely return home. But even though my love for Elk Grove is hanging on by a thread, Elk Grove and the people I met there hold a piece of my heart. I wouldn't trade anything for my memories in the astro van, or breakfast with Dubie, or making lots and lots of Mac N Cheese at Corndogs house.
 When it comes down to it, I have started to spread little pieces of me all over the world. My adventurous side is in Peru, my caring side is in Mexico, my desire for family is spread throughout Utah and France, My roots are in Seattle, my outgoing side is in Elk Grove, and my heart is with me, being shared with whoever I may meet.
Although I don't quite know if I consider Seattle, Elk Grove, or Utah home, one thing is for sure. Each place has helped create who I am and who I will become. To my future homes and friends, I look forward to meeting you.

Step On a Crack and You Will Break Your Mother's Back

Sometimes I purposefully don't
step on cracks
so that I don't
break my mother's back.

I remember as a young girl
walking to the bus stop,
and dancing across the sidewalk
as I jumped and leaped
over the cracks and imperfections
created by natural disasters
 that ripped lives apart.

I remember thinking it was funny.
My mom is dead, I would think.
Could I hurt her back in heaven?
What about my step mom?
Do I care if I break her back?

But really it was just a game.
A simple saying that all grade school kids
sang as we double douched
and hop skipped

Gracefully watching my step
was my way of showing my mother I loved her.
Today I was reminded of this
When I purposefully didn't step on any cracks.

Sum Up

Finals are approaching rapidly and I am trying to steer clear of my desire to procrastinate. It's crazy to think that I will finally be done in July. So much has happened since I started my college career in 2008. Although I am graduating late for my grade, not all of my time has gone wasted. The last five years have been wonderful yet challenging. I met a boy who I thought was the one, married him, and then got divorced less than a year and a half later. I spent four months in Mexico. I spent two months in Peru. I made some amazing friends. I have been working at a job I love for three years now, and I am dating the boy I hope to marry one day. With our one year anniversary, finals being over, and Christmas all around the corner I would have to say that I have a lot to be grateful for.

Please enjoy this musical treasure.

A Humble Boycott

Here is the thing,
I love to write,
like I love to write.

Writing is my outlet
and I do it daily for my own pleasure

Today I am avoiding writing.

I have a 10 page paper
and another 5 page paper
a presentation,
a book report,
and 3 final exams
all within the next two weeks.

So today,
I am avoiding writing
I am using my power to say no
and boycott one of the loves of my life

Who ever needed words and writing anyway?

Oh wait,
I did.